Earlier this year, I said goodbye to a career I'd paid good money to get a Master's degree for and a near-six figure job to do something completely different. I am following my passion as a writer.
The change has been great for my psyche, but sometimes I find myself feeling like I'm no longer a productive member of society...well, not yet anyway. It's hard knowing that I'm not really contributing to the household expenses like I used to when I had a steady gig.
Aside from my own insecurities, it's even more amplified when people see that I'm not physically going to a place to do a job everyday. One of my sisters told me I didn't work and sat at home all day, doing nothing. Albeit, it was one of those comments a person makes in the "heat of the moment" since we were technically having a fight. But, boy did that ever strike a nerve!
My dad recently referred to me as "unemployed." Although it's not truly what he meant to say because he knows I'm self-employed. He just meant that I wasn't a slave to the workforce and could structure my day as I wanted to. I have to admit I did lash out a bit at him for calling me unemployed (sorry, Dad!). Likely a product of my own feelings and how others such as my sister see my writing career.
Why is it when people aren't going to a physical place everyday for a set number of hours, they're seen as not really working or having a job? Hello, society? I have news for you. I do have a job; I am a writer! It may be sporadic and sure, I'm not doing it 8-10 hours a day, five days a week.
I may stand strong and be proud of what I have decided to do, but in the back of my mind, my neurosis sits on a swivel chair and points out that I'm not making money doing what I'm doing. To that I reply to a seemingly empty room where the echo is deafening, "it's like starting a new business where you don't immediately make money and besides, I'm doing something that I love, so I should forget everything I learned about being a productive member of society, right? right?"
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